Thermonuclear Reaction

Okay, just a warning...I am having a meltdown of biblical proportions today. End of days type of a meltdown. The kind of conniption that is only rivaled by Godzilla's wrath on Tokyo. I want to chew people up and then spit them back out. Once all of the time zones catch up to a wakeable hour, I'm going to make a phone call to help me get my sanity back.

I'm having a really tough time with my son, A (aka Spike). He's taken on the bad habit of lying lately. It's like you can't rely on anything he says, from where he's been to what he's had for breakfast. Also, he's just been downright defiant.

Our most recent "match" began on Friday. This part is absolutely ridiculous and I am embarrassed to even write about it. I came downstairs in the morning to an freshly opened box of Golden Grahams. No big deal, right? Well, I said to A, "Could you do me a favor? Can you please not open any more boxes of cereal until we finish the other *five* that are open? I don't want them to get stale and subsequently get wasted." The reply, "Sure, mom!"

Monday morning, I'm looking for cereal for my daughter. Open the closets, low and behold, *all* of the open boxes of cereal are gone! Wow, either someone was really hungry on Saturday and Sunday or my intelligence is being underestimated by a sneaky 15 year old.

Yesterday, I was cleaning out the garage and getting the recycling together. One of the paper bags tore open and spilled out onto the floor. A paper that was folded up so small that it looked like a cube caught my eye. On it were instructions for hacking passwords off of any computer that runs Windows.

Spoke with A, he did take all of the open boxes of cereal and hide them in his bedroom. He didn't like those flavors, so he figured he'd get rid of them himself. Nice try!

Asked him about the instructions I found in the garage, and he says, "Okay, that was me. Do you want me to tell you whose passwords I have so they can change them?" Hello, that is not the point! You cannot unring a bell! Now that you have the knowledge of how to get anyone's password, it doesn't matter if we change our passwords a hundred times, you can just summon them up anytime you want to!

After that discussion, I moved on to an incident that happened about two weeks ago. I was going upstairs to get my pocketbook so that I could leave for work. I heard A telling my other son T, "Don't worry. Mom will never find out." Then T said, "I am really nervous about this, A." Asked him what that was about. That was because my husband was running a virus scan on the computer and T was nervous because he had downloaded *porn* onto the family computer. My son A had removed it prior to the scan to save T's behind. Yeah, 13 and 15 year old kids looking at this smut. I nearly had a stroke!

But of course, the boy with an answer for everything says, "I don't see why you are getting all upset about the porn. These people are paid actors. Nobody is forcing them." I went into an absolute tirade about the correlation between porn actors and a history of sexual abuse. He just sighed and gave me the "you are so stupid" look. Then he tells me of the "married couples" that are doing this for extra money. Yeah, "it must be true because I saw it on the internet" reasoning.

I have *so* had it! I am ready to smash their computer to bits this morning! And it's not even 8am yet!